Dandy Cat

I’ve noticed that the review format I’ve been using for the last year, e.g., Letterboxd Diaries—January 2022, has started to feel restrictive. Confining myself to a handful of sentences to encapsulate my thoughts about entire films doesn’t feel like the best way to talk about them.

From now on, the links included with the movie titles in these Letterboxd Diaries will send you to my review on Letterboxd. This way, I can write as much or as little about these films as I want. I can stop worrying about these posts ballooning into the size of a small novel. Also, there can be multiple paragraphs. Exciting!

• Eight Legged Freaks: ★★
• Like Father, Like Son: ★★★★½
• Ikiru: ★★★★★
• Down by Law: ★★★½
• The Luck of the Irish: ★★½
• Spencer: ★★★★
• The Power of the Dog: ★★★★½
• Cruella: ★★★½
• Killer Klowns from Outer Space: ★★
• The Sure Thing: ★★★½
• 8½: ★★★★½
• Eternals: ★★★
• Life: ★★★
• Contact: ★★★★½ ↺
• Justice League: Doom: ★★★★
• F for Fake: ★★★★½
• Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story: ★★½ ↺
• The King’s Man: ★★½
• Funny Face: ★★★★½
• Ran: ★★★★★
• Hometown Cha-Cha-Cha: ★★★★½
• Laggies: ★★★
• King Richard: ★★★★
• West Side Story (2021): ★★★★

Total movies watched: 24.

Favorite movie of the month: Funny Face. I really loved Hometown Cha-Cha-Cha, but it’s a tv show and not really in the spirit of this part.

Least favorite movie of the month: Killer Klowns from Outer Space.

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• Paddington: What a fun and soothing balm this film was! I’ve got very little experience with the story of Paddington, the bear from Darkest Peru, but as far as I can tell, this one is something that everyone can love. There were some tense and heavy moments, so it’s not sunshine and rainbows all the way through. However, I loved the trouble that Paddington would get himself into. His goofiness, charm, and innocent way of looking at the world captured my heart as easily as it captured those of the Brown family. (★★★★½)
• Withnail & I: Let this film be a lesson to us all: never be an English actor in the ‘60s. It’s only going to end poorly. You’ll end up pissed out of your mind, wracked with paranoia, and stumble into an accidental vacation out in the countryside. It’s appropriate that Ralph Steadman is responsible for this film’s artwork these days because this one was about as psychotic as Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. It’s about as brilliant, too. The energy is propulsive and insane. You’re sure to want a shower after watching this one. (★★★★)
• Presumed Innocent: There were a whole lot of shocking revelations at the end of this film. It’s a shame the beginning felt bogged down with sleepy talking in drab law offices. That sure does make it a bit of a challenge to follow all of the plot intricacies. When the film finally got to the courtroom proceedings, things kicked into gear. That was all done well—it was authentic, suspenseful, and included about as many breaks to confer in the backstage hallways as a real court case involves. I don’t think this one is going to stick with me like the best of the genre, but it was fun while it lasted. And holy cow, Raul Julia was great! (★★★½)
• Vice: I’m struggling to find a reason to create a biopic about a man that, by the film’s admission, has let very little of his personal life be known. So then, what is the point of a film like this? To humanize a bastard? To show the asshole parts that make up an asshole sum? To show the true power of the puppeteer? To condemn others for not stopping a bloodthirsty monster who is supported by the machine he’s helping run? I’m not sure this film knows what it’s trying to do. It’s too eager to get to its next clever editing trick to figure out what the message is. Perhaps what it can do is educate—show what happens when terrible people run rampant. Prove that absolute power corrupts absolutely. It’s also a showcase for Christian Bale’s considerable talents. Oh, and Alfred Molina. Aside from those things it was about as effective as the War on Terror. (★★½)
• In the Line of Fire: This is kind of wild to watch these days. On the one hand, the great cat and mouse game between Clint Eastwood and John Malkovich never gets tiresome. It’s a thrill all the way through. On the other hand, it’s unpleasant to watch a dinosaur man try to seduce a woman who is easily at least a couple of decades his junior. Ugh, and in such an outdated, “you should be thankful I’m even noticing you” sort of way. Stay for the action, is all I can say. It’s a good thing this film excels at its action pieces. (★★★½)
• Self/less: How could a movie made by the director of The Fall and with such an interesting high-concept story be this boring and ineffective? The whole thing loses its thread faster than you can blink. It keeps forgetting its own premise, allowing Ryan Reynolds to be himself when he should be Ben Kingsley. I felt a real lack of stakes with this one and that made it all too easy to ignore. I wish this was more of a dazzling Tarsem film and far less of an entirely bland and forgettable action film. (★★)
• 50/50: Once it finds its footing, this film shines. There’s a slightly rocky opening that doesn’t include a whole lot about dealing with the cancer that’s central to the story. It’s necessary, though, and makes everything that follows affecting and occasionally devastating. This is one of those smaller budget films that allows its impressive cast to really show off their chops, and they do that here. Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogen each bring welcome depth to their characters. This may not be the happiest film, but it is very life-affirming. Also, fuck cancer. (★★★★) ↺
• Louise: As a man, I can confidently say two things: we suck and the world would be far better off if we stopped forcing our mad, ego-driven, stolen power on everyone else. Those truths are depicted poignantly in this short film. It goes by in a flash, but the dawning realization of how these too young girls are treated by everyone in this microcosm of dance will stick around for a long time. Its animation is also exquisite. It has beautiful energy and moves between light and darkness with confidence and grace, firmly placing the viewer in its world. It’s tough to watch, but worth it. (★★★★)
• Jaws: The first blockbuster, and arguably still the best blockbuster. This is as thrilling, emotional, and action-packed as great films get. It really set a high-water mark (no pun intended) that few films after this one have ever achieved. The first half does a superb job of setting the high stakes. The second half is a chase-buddy scene that keeps the tension high. It’s just excellent. (★★★★★) ↺
• The Passion of Joan of Arc: What a moving tragedy. To see such belief picked apart and torn down by men who are afraid of losing their positions of power was agonizing. And really, what else was it but that? These clergy—by far more evil than the person whom they condemned—cannot bear to have their authority usurped or allegiances broken. No, it must only be them who can communicate with their deity. Anyone who claims to have that same power, and especially a woman, must be mad and silenced. So they burn a teenager at the stake, and all because of a broken sense of righteousness. It’s all depicted in a towering film. Maria Falconetti is beyond compare. Carl Th. Dreyer crafted an experience that still feels so modern and experimental. This one is glorious. (★★★★★)
• Niagara: There isn’t any other song. You’ve got that right, Marilyn. Now I would never condone cheating on your spouse, but oh boy, George Loomis wasn’t doing a whole lot to foster a happy home life. Should that end in infidelity and murder? Nope. Everyone sucks here (except for Polly Cutler). Special additional shout out to Ray Cutler who kept ogling the pretty blonde while around and negging his wife. This was my first Marilyn Monroe film and it was okay. Ultimately, it was forgettable, but I had a decent time while watching it. (★★★½)
• Pickup on South Street: You’d think this film was all about pickpockets, microfilm, and nighttime embraces, but the most interesting person in this whole thing is the tired stoolie/tie salesperson, Moe. You could make an entire movie about her and it would be one of the most moving and universal stories ever put to film. We’re all Moe, just trying to make ends meet any way we can. The whole pickpocket… let’s just call it a b-story at this point, is thrilling and mysterious. People get punched, the bad guys are caught, and everything is wrapped up in a neat bow, at least for the people you might end up cheering for. It’s gritty noir done in little whispers and crashing outbursts. (★★★★½)
• CODA: I was in happy tears by the end of this one. It’s a film that, to the best of my knowledge, tells a story that hasn’t been explored before. Or, if it has, then not nearly as well or as touching as this one. Being a child of deaf adults is understandably a challenge for all involved. When it comes to being hearing disabled, this is a fact that goes overlooked so often, especially in movies. CODA explores those issues in a respectful way. It also does that while showing just how wonderful, complicated, and weird love can be. This is a lovely film. I hope more stories like this one will be told. (★★★★)
• Spaceballs: This is another one of those ‘80s films that I really should have seen when I was much younger. It’s beloved, and I can see why, but it’s not doing anything for me personally. As far as spoofs and Mel Brooks movies go, this one is pretty middle of the road. It’s imaginative and the character names are great. However, the pacing is rough, and well, I imagine it was funnier when it came out. The John Hurt cameo made it 100% worth it. (★★★)
• Terms of Endearment: What a sneaky film this was! One moment you’re watching a young woman grow up and fall in love and the next you’re getting punched in the gut. Is there any warning for the twists and turns this one makes? Hardly, but if you’re open to everything, then I think this one is rewarding. The performances and writing make it all worthwhile. It’s not the most impressive-looking thing, but there’s no question about it deserving the several Oscars it won. This was a remarkable and touching ride. (★★★★)
• Psycho Goreman: Clearly a cult classic in the making. All it needs is a few more years. It’s got such a genuine love for gruesome and practical monster effects of the sort that were all the rage in the ‘80s and ‘90s. That sort of thing isn’t exactly my cup of tea, but I can appreciate how well it’s used here. The filmmakers reveled in making their fake blood budget go a long way. This also feels like it should have been more of a short film—it starts stretching thin after too long. Regardless, I’ve never seen a movie better suited for young horror lovers. It’s got a nice message, too: Use the power of love to destroy the galaxy! (★★★½)
• It Happened One Night: As the proto-romcom, this is charming, fun, and absolutely hilarious. Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert were only in two movies together and that’s a damn shame. Their chemistry is boisterous and spirited from the get-go. I wish they were in many more movies together! This one will have you chuckling along with their witty banter and hoping that those Walls of Jericho will finally come toppling down. This is as fun and memorable as movies get. (★★★★★)
• 9 to 5: Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, and Dolly Parton having enough of men’s workplace nonsense is the sort of pick-me-up that can turn a dull day into a great one. Comic geniuses plus a story about getting back at one of the worst bosses of all time? Sounds hilarious and engaging to me! Their camaraderie makes the story feel propulsive. If there was a sour note, then I couldn’t find it. More movies should be imbued with the silly energy that this one shines with. Time for me to watch everything else featuring these amazing women. (★★★★½)
• The Third Man: Whenever I hear about this film it’s all Joseph Cotten and Orson Welles, but I was captivated by Alina Valli. She’s beautiful, yes. She’s subtle and lets the universe inside her out in tiny drips and drops. She can tell an entire life story in a fleeting glance. Oh, then there’s the mystery of this story! Who killed Harry Lime? But is he even dead? That may not even be the most interesting story in this film, and that’s saying something. This is a gorgeous film with a unique score. It demands close and repeated viewing, which I’m all too happy to give. (★★★★½)
• La Femme Nikita: If this isn’t the first woman-has-to-choose-between-learning-to-be-an-assassin-or-be-executed film, then it’s definitely the best of the bunch. Nikita never stops believing in the promise of a good and carefree life, even when it means sacrificing what makes her happy. That pull against her obligation to kill makes for several satisfying emotional conflicts. She may be talented, but the immoral demands of her job take too much of a toll. By the end, it’s hard not to feel sad for her. It all makes for a confident film that’s also full of action, but with a slightly underwhelming finish. Anne Parillaud is magnificent throughout. (★★★★) ↺
• Forrest Gump: Many have criticized, and rightly so, the underlying, but probably unintentional, message of this film. Fall in line if you want to succeed. Step out of line and you’ll have a shit life before dying of AIDS. I don’t necessarily disagree with any of the objections, but this is also a story of a man who’s lived one hell of a life (even if he might not realize that). It’s a film crafted with exquisite care and love. It’s hard not to be sucked into the world that the film depicts. There are more than a few heart-wrenching and triumphant moments. All of which contribute to making this one the lasting story that it is. As always, it’s moving. (★★★★½) ↺
• Dave: Perfectly pleasant, like a mug of hot cocoa at the end of a long, chilly day. Depicting the ultimate switcheroo, the U.S. finally gets itself a president worth celebrating. I guess it had to happen sometime. Kevin Kline pulls double duty as the President and a double hired to play him after falling victim to a major stroke. Luckily, Dave is a decent guy and the country ends up with a “leader” who’s actually worthy of the title. The film doesn’t offer much in the way of surprises, but it makes up for that with excellent performances and a good heart. (★★★½)
• Moonstruck: I could die a happy person if I got to see La bohème with Nicolas Cage in my finest duds. That may not ever happen, but I did get to see Cher enjoy an opera-filled evening out with him and that’s enough. This film was top to bottom delightful. It especially shines whenever Cher’s character is surrounded by her family. They’ve all got stellar chemistry. Throw in several dashes of infidelity and pasta dinners and this becomes a film I wish I had seen far earlier than now. Did Cher ever earn her Oscar here! (★★★★½)
• Some Like It Hot: Whoever taught Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon how to run in heels is the true hero of this film. They were an absolute delight the whole way through as a pair of stage musicians on the run from the mob. Oh, and Marilyn! This is the second film I’ve seen her in and what a performance she gave. Her singing numbers were memorable—full of life and passion. I don’t need to be the one to say that Billy Wilder was a genius, but his great talent is on full display here. This is a perfect “will make your day immediately better” film and one that I can’t wait to see again. (★★★★★)
• Blush: Well-told, deeply personal, and beautifully animated. This is a love letter in short film form to the director’s late wife and it packs an emotional punch. For me, it was good while it lasted. I was impressed with the visual style and quality, as well. This is a good inclusion into the Apple TV+ catalog. (★★★½)

Total movies watched: 25.

My favorite movie of the month: Paddington. I watched some stellar films this month, but that’s the one that made me the happiest.

My least favorite movie of the month: It’s a toss-up between the bitter boredom of Self/less and the frustration of Vice.

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• Noelle: Delightful, cheesy, and full of more Christmas-related puns than you can shake a candy cane at. The story was well-meaning and heartfelt. I enjoyed the characters and I appreciate that everyone got everything they wanted and deserved. It’s exactly what a low-stakes Christmas movie should be. It wouldn’t have hurt anything if the script was written better, but you shouldn’t expect greatness from a movie like this. (★★★)
• Jungle Cruise: While energetic and entertaining, it was also too long and overly complex. This is the sort of adventure movie you watch for the actors, all of whom are enjoying their journey through a dangerous jungle. They’re all very engaging. Unfortunately, the story can’t keep up. It’s needlessly dense. It made me long for the sort of older adventure movie that had to rely on a strong script to tell its story, instead of lots of too dark or too frantic visual effects. (★★★)
• Wish I Was Here: I’m not entirely sure that Zach Braff’s skill as a writer has kept up with his preoccupations and ponderings about life. You get flashes of greatness and honesty whenever Mandy Patinkin is on screen, but those moments are too few and far between. He’s a good director with a keen eye for eccentric visuals. He proved that with Garden State. However, that one succeeded because the lost twenty-something story fit well with where he was in life, and he put that on the page. Everything felt appropriate. Playing a lost thirty-something written in the tone of voice of that quirky twenty-something makes this story feel incongruous and lacking. (★★½)
• To Die For: In a better world, there would be more than just a single Nicole Kidman-Gus Van Sant collaboration. Sadly, we don’t live in that world, but the one collaboration we have is phenomenal and clearly influential. It’s hard to imagine any modern husband murdering film existing without this one having been made. And you’re telling me that Nicole Kidman didn’t get at least an Oscar nomination for this multi-faceted and manipulative performance? Talk about criminal. (★★★★)
• Justice League: War: An enjoyable bit of action-packed, non-story DC animation. There is very little substance to all the stylish explosions, though. It’s a darn shame, though, because the genesis of the Justice League should be a story that’s captivating and outright awesome. Instead, what we have is just a showcase for these superheroes and their powers. It’s decent at what it does, but that’s barely enough to make a movie. (★★★)
• No Time to Die: A fitting and satisfying conclusion to Daniel Craig’s tenure as the inimitable James Bond. In many ways, this strays a good distance away from the “classic” Bond tropes of yore, but this series has always been about serializing a unique story, fit for Craig’s talents. I don’t think this one suffers because he’s womanizing less or cutting back on any of the other iffy traits that have previously defined this person. This film does suffer because of its lengthy running time and unfortunate underutilization of Rami Malek. However, it’s a thrilling film with great direction. I’m looking forward to seeing where this character goes next (because there will always be more Bond), and I hope director Cary Joji Fukunaga gets to do whatever he wants now. (★★★★)
• Barb & Star Go to Vista Del Mar: You know what? This just keeps getting better and weirder and more lovely each time I see it. What a great bit of silliness. It hardly ever lets up and it’s hilarious all the way through. I love that this film exists. (★★★★½) ↺
• Adult Life Skills: Jodie Whitaker is, unsurprisingly, fantastic. She’s always unassailable. Otherwise, her character got so much strife over her grieving process, to the point where the people in her life seemed malicious and heartless. The representation of the other characters left a bad taste in my mouth, and I think they’re what hurt the film. Had there been a little more compassion in this film, it would have ranked higher with me. (★★★½)
• The French Dispatch: I went into this one expecting more of a comedy akin to The Grand Budapest Hotel, so I was surprised to find a much drier and occasionally more morose film here. This threw me off, so I’m looking forward to seeing it again when I can be in the right mindset. That said, it’s still quintessentially a Wes Anderson film. It looks, sounds, and feels like a pure representation of his personal interests and style. We’re all lucky to be given original movies like his. (★★★★)
• Law Abiding Citizen: This film has about as much depth to it as a kiddie pool. What starts as righteous vindication turns into a senseless parade of obscene violence. At that point, the central character’s motivation loses all purpose and reason. His grief and anger over losing his family dissolves into blind, murderous anarchy. It’s blunt, it’s hollow, and there’s very little resolution. It’s a decent action movie, but it never rises above “okay, but barely.” (★★½)
• Rubber: I think it helps a lot to watch this one while understanding that it’s clear a piece of surrealist fiction. It helped make the whole thing more palatable to me. Of course, I’d completely understand if anybody told me it was also a piece of garbage. There’s a good amount of evidence to support that claim. On the plus side, the production quality was decent for a film of this size. Hard to get over how incoherent it is, though. I mean, nothing was resolved and the ending only raised more unanswered questions. (★★)
• The Limey: There’s such a laidback, afternoon sun kind of mood to this film. It feels relaxed and full of focused intent, and it permeates through every moment. What starts as a rather simple story of revenge over the loss of a child blooms into a whole web of duplicity, federal agents, and murder. Terrence Stamp is phenomenal. His brash character and quick words make it nearly impossible to take your eyes off this thing. This is one of those great ‘90s films that I’d love to live in way after the credits finish. (★★★★) ↺
• The Holiday: What sort of person leaves their darling dog alone with a complete stranger and travels across the world to trade homes with them for two weeks? They could be a dog murderer looking for exotic dogs to murder! All that aside, this should be sooo much shorter, but it’s fun and charming. A nice holiday or any day movie. All I want now is to watch an entire film of Eli Wallach telling stories about old Hollywood (or even just his shopping list). Immediate top five movie right there. (★★★)
• Jennifer’s Body: This movie should be a lesson to us all—if a c-tier indie band with hair curtains invites you to go anywhere with them, immediately run far away while screaming. Also, if someone suggests you watch this great film, you drop everything you’re doing and give it a watch. It’s better than it was ever given credit for. Give Diablo Cody, Karyn Kusama, and Megan Fox more work. They did stuff here that is being recognized waaay too late. It shows potential for filmmaking that can and surely will be truly sensational. (★★★★)
• Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps: The only impressive thing about this film was Oliver Stone’s constant use of David Byrne and Brian Eno’s album, Everything That Happens Will Happen Today, at every turn. Actually, that’s exactly not true. Carrie Mulligan and Michael Douglas are great. Too good for this one, certainly. Charlie Sheen is immediately more magnetic than Shia LaBeouf, as evidenced by the former’s all too brief cameo. Seeing him again made me long for more of his character instead of someone who seems sleepy and in way over his head. This film is just disappointing. The first one was so watchable; this one is so dull. (★★½)
• The Matrix Resurrections: This was pretty decent, but I can only imagine how much better it would be if weren’t all stuffed into a single film. It’s self-referential nearly to a fault, although that tool is used in a way that doesn’t usually seem out of place. However, it’s still playing a stuck-in-the-past balancing act and it wobbles far too much. There are a lot of great ideas in here, ideas that progress the story in meaningful ways, but its speedy pacing and lack of depth leave those concepts unexplored. It’s a fine film if not compared to the previous installments, but that’s difficult. Ultimately, I feel disappointed with it because the first film proved how revolutionary this story can be. (★★★½)
• Don’t Look Up: This movie made me feel ill, but not because it was bad. I felt so unwell because most things here feel like they could actually happen. Seems to me that the pushback that this one is getting is the same sort of response that the scientists received in the film. Then again, satire, even when it’s as heavy-handed as this one, isn’t always greeted with a standing ovation. Sometimes, as is the case here, it’s received with a collective meh or outright rejection from people who should heed its warnings the most. And then they look around and wonder, “Why didn’t anyone try to warn us? You should have done something! Damn everybody but me!” The film definitely didn’t need to be 143 minutes long. That was over-indulgent and detracted from its point. Leonardo DiCaprio and Jennifer Lawrence were phenomenal, as always. (★★★½)
• Harakiri: Has there ever been another story that unfolds with such meticulous grace, captures your heart with such a cruel tragedy at its center, or thrills with such hold-your-breath action? I can’t possibly think of another film quite as perfect as this one. Perhaps Rashomon with its twisting, moving story, but you could count this film’s peers on probably a single hand. I was enraptured the entire time this was playing. What a perfect introduction to Masaki Kobayashi. I couldn’t have wished for a better introduction to this person’s work. (★★★★★)
• The Net: If this movie actually depicted the future of the internet, we’d either all be dead at the hands of murderous Terminators or living in utopian civilizations on Mars. Maybe we’d be on Mars because of evil, killer robots. Better to live on another planet than be exterminated on our home. Assuming the murder-bots don’t figure out space travel themselves, that is. I wouldn’t put it past them. After all, they achieved sentience and figured out how to survive all of our best weapons. Anyway, this movie was a whole floppy disk full of meh. (★★)

Total movies watched: 19.

Favorite movie of the month: Harakiri.

Least favorite movie of the month: The Net, but the Wall Street sequel was a real close second.

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